Wank...

or perhaps, Splat

The British certainly can turn a phrase - Wank, that is.
Splat is simply the onomatopoeic description of the result.

Let's just say that yes, I did & yes, I did.

I unlocked on the 15th, and did manage to hold off for several more days.

Here is the verdict.
The vent holes led to some chafing. In addition there were some hairline cracks on the seams of the CB which also led to some minor cuts. I did not notice them until I could feel them (see above)

So - time to upgrade to a CB6k and see what happens.